The Heart Wants What It Wants
by KristinEW21
Summary: AU. They were passionately in love, until she left him without so much as a note, and now four years later she is back. IMPORTANT MESSAGE ON MY PROFILE PLEASE READ. COMPLETE
1. After four years

After four years, all it took was thirty minutes.

Thirty minutes for Serena and Darien to end up in a cubical of a woman's loo with Serena's skirt pushed up half-hazard around her hips with Darien's face between her legs.

At the sharp intake of breath Darien heard Serena draw in, he knew she was getting close to her climax. For a few moments he continued to glide his tongue along the sides of her center, but when her legs began to quiver slightly, he stopped to run his tongue over his lips, tasting her scent as he peppered kisses along the inside of her thighs. When he finally stood up, wiping his mouth, he stared into bright eyes that were absolutely ablaze with naked greed.

Serena returned Darien's gaze, smiling mischievously at the dark lust behind them. With little patience, she slipped her small hands behind the waist of his pants and began to hurriedly unbuckle his belt; pushing them down roughly, but just enough for her to put her hands around his erection. Instinctively she wrapped her legs around his waist as he hoisted her up with one hand. As she urgently guided him in, he cupped her face to bring her into a kiss.

At the full press of his body against hers, her ragged breath hitched in her throat as she adjusted to him; and for a moment neither moved. He felt so good and after all those years her body had forgotten nothing about his touch. Slowly, she began to roll her hips against his.

Darien brought her lips back to his, rolling his tongue over hers as they began a tempered grind. When he drew back, locking eyes with her again, he marveled at how much he had missed her, how much he had missed what they were doing now.

Their pace was picking up, and it felt like a familiar dance that neither had forgotten. The muscles of her walls tightened and released around him in quick pulses as she pulled his hips forward, urging him further into her. It took every fiber of his will to keep from coming first.

_Just like I remembered_, he thought as he placed one hand over the top of the cubical steadying himself, while the other stroked her smooth thigh.

Serena grinded her hips harder against him, and arched her back, silently demanding him to bring her to her peak. Darien sought out the curve of her neck, to trace his lips along her jaw line. Inhaling the scent of her perfume he savored the motion of each deliberate, upward thrust.

When their movements became quickened and frantic, Serena grabbed his hand to cover her mouth just as her climax ripped through her body, forcing a muffled scream. A few seconds later, Darien's orgasm followed and he buried his face in her neck.


	2. 30 minutes earlier

I don't own sailor moon just the story.

This is what happened before the first chapter.

Thirty minutes earlier

The T- Room, located in downtown London, featured various jazz bands on Wednesday nights. Darien hadn't seen the Keynotes a four part jazz band since his days at Oxford. They were the opening act for big names now days and he wanted to catch them before they went out on tour.

He was sitting at a bar table with his current girlfriend Allison. They had been dating just over six months and although he had come to care a lot about her, he knew he wasn't in love. She was a good lay, held a decent conversation and she liked Soccer, but he was with her (even though he would never admit this to himself) because she reminded him of Serena.

He was taking a sip from his beer, enjoying the music when his attention was drawn to the door. Between the dim lighting, crowdedness and the cigarette smoke, which hung heavy in the air, it was difficult for him to recognize the woman who had just sauntered into the bar

_That can't be' Serena' _Darien thought to himself. He shook his head slightly trying to dismiss the possibility. But as the golden-haired figure started to make her way through the crowd, he found himself straining his neck trying to make out her face.

_That can't be Serena! She's in Italy. Besides, Mina would have told me if she was in town._ He thought to himself, but immediately questioned if that was true.

He was about to take another sip of his beer when the cigarette smoke cleared momentarily and the woman's face became visible. It was Serena.

"Fuck!" Darien blurted out as he dropped his beer bottle knocking over his girlfriends drink as well.

"Shit!" Allison yelled as they both jumped up.

"Oh, damn! I'm sorry!" Darien apologized reaching for napkins, trying to clean up the spill.

His eyes kept darting from Allison's shocked, annoyed expression back to Serena as she continued to make her way through the crowd. He noticed for the first time that she was holding on to the hand of a tall blonde haired man.

"Are you alright"" He shouted over the music. Allison looked at him and rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, fine," She grabbed a handful of napkins and started wiping the front of her dress. "It's a good thing I wore black, otherwise!" She trailed off.

"I'm really sorry!" Darien apologized again.

"Its okay." She spoke into his ear. "Just order me another drink. I'll be right back." She patted his arm as she walked past him and headed towards the loo.

"Damn!" He mumbled to himself and waved a waitress over to his table. He was still keeping an eye on Serena as she and the blonde haired guy continued to struggle through the crowd. What the hell is she doing here? He thought.

The waitress, who was close by, made it over, and by the time she walked off to retrieve his order, Serena and the guy she was with were only a few feet away. Darien saw the guy lean over and say something in Serena's ear causing her to laugh. As she turned, stepping aside to avoid getting bumped by some guy, she looked up and saw his face stopping dead in her tracks.

_My God' she's beautiful._ His mind acknowledged like it was the first time he had every laid eyes on her.

Although it had been four years since he had last saw her, he was astonished at how little she had changed.

They stood there staring at one another for what felt like an eternity. Darien was barely conscious of the fact that the band had stopped playing, which made it possible for him to hear the guy ask. "Did you spot a table for us to sit at, babe?" The question jarred them both out of their uncomfortable silence.

Serena opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out. Darien spoke up instead. "Hello, Serena." He stuffed his hands in his pockets trying to mask his sudden nervousness.

Finding her voice, she said, "Darien, wow! It's been a…it's been a while."

"Yeah, it's been a really long time." He replied, voice cracking slightly.

The guy, Darien noticed, was eyeing their faces with mild suspension. He didn't wait for an introduction. "Hello, I'm Patrick Drake." He stuck out his hand to shake Darien's and possessively placed the other around Serena's waist. Darien disliked him immediately.

Acknowledging the awkwardness, Serena turned and looked up at him. "Oh, I'm sorry Patrick. This is Darien Shields…"

"Pleasure to meet you," Patrick interrupted.

Darien reluctantly extended his arm to shake his hand. He didn't know why, and he knew he had no right to feel this way, but all of a sudden, this guy touching Serena bothered him. But more than that, he was bothered by the way Serena had played down their acquaintance.

"Nice to meet you," Darien responded dryly, diverting his attention back to Serena. "So how have you been? You look...you look great." He gestured his hand out towards her.

"I've uh…I've been well, real good," She replied nervously. "And you…you look really good yourself." He noticed her biting the side of her bottom lip, and for a second he thought he caught the slightest hint of want in her eyes.

"So, Oxford University, huh? " "Toe Head", as Darien thought of him, refusing to be ignored, interrupted again. "It's funny, Ena rarely talks about her days there," His tone laced with disdain towards Darien.

Serena must have caught his tone also, because in that brief moment, he saw her jaw clinch slightly. He wasn't sure if that was due to "Toe Head" using a nickname, which she had always hated, or the thinly veiled contempt in his statement. She looked back up at him, forcing a smile on her face. "Did you two major in the same field because she rarely talks about her time there? "

He allowed a moment to pass before he replied. _Where in the hell did she find this asshole? _He was suddenly angry with her. _And why am I allowing this guy to get under my skin? Why should I even care? Me and Serena broke up years ago. _He thought bitterly. But, despite the logic, a part of him wanted to tell this dick, that he and Serena had definitely shared something major, but it had nothing to do with school.

The warning look in Serena's eyes made him re-think the idea, which only made him angrier. Darien scratched at the beard he was growing out, twisted his lips in a half smile and replied. "Well we, uh we did have a few general classes together," His gaze shifted back to Serena, "But our majors they just weren't the same."

Serena recoiled, glaring at him angrily. It was a low blow she didn't deserve, he knew, but "Toe Heads" comment had riled him and because she was with him, she made herself the easy target.

In typical Serena fashion, she recovered quickly plastering a murderous smile on her face. "Yeah, we did have a few general classes together." She put her arms around 'Toe Heads' waist. "But Darien, didn't you end up failing a few of those classes" She looked at him, smiling sarcastically.

Darien's lips pursed into a tight line; her remark had cut.

Thankfully, Allison chose that moment to return from the loo. "You know it's a good thing you're…" She stopped as she realized someone else was standing there. "Oh, hello." She looked from Darien to Serena and Patrick.

Hoping the feeling of relief that came over him didn't show on his face, he made a display of kissing Allison to get a reaction from Serena. "Hey baby, I hope I didn't ruin your dress."

She placed her hands in his, smiling. "Oh, don't worry; I'll be sure to give you my dry cleaning bill."

Darien turned back to Serena whose sarcastic smile had faded into a slight frown. "I'm sorry, Allison this is an old college mate, Serena Tsukino and her"" He gestured towards "Toe Head" unsure of what he was to Serena.

"Patrick Drake. Pleasure to meet you." He responded blandly sticking out his hand. Serena slowly stuck out her hand too.

"It's a pleasure to meet you both." Allison stated. Serena, Darien noticed, was regarding Allison with a skeptic gaze. She kept her expression even when she looked at him. "Have you been in London these past years? "

"I did some interning in France three years ago but it was only a six month program after I finished with Oxford."

He saw her face brighten. The corners of her lips curling into a brief smile.

"Darien's incredibly respected in the Hospital. He has so many awards for his contributions it's impossible to count." Allison endorsed. "Did you know he discovered a plant in Singapore that has slowed down the degeneration of childhood Locemia?"

"No, I didn't, I rarely read the tosh that would report such a thing," 'Toe Head responded snidely.

Serena who was still staring at Darien, responded slowly. "No, I hadn't." Her smile grew wider. "Is sounds like the kind of thing Darien would do. He always had a thing for rescuing children."

"Yes, that's almost as interesting as what you do babe," Patrick said.

"Oh, where do you work"" Allison asked excitedly.

"I'm a fashion designer for Channel. I'm in different countries all the time, I've been working in Italy for the past four years" She flashed a genuine smile.

"Oh, I bet that is so exciting!" Allison grinned.

"It's more glamorous from your point of view. But I feel very fulfilled with what I do," She looked at Darien again, the private smile returning to her lips.

"I'm glad to see you doing what you always wanted to do Serena," Darien commented.

"Thank you, and the same to you,"

She cast her eyes down, unsure of what else to say. "Well, we really should find a table." 'Toe Head' stated.

"Why don't you two sit with us?" Allison offered. He and Serena exchanged a brief panicked look.

"No, that's okay, but thank you, we'll find a place to sit." Serena responded quickly.

"Yeah, I'm sure by the time they find two chairs they will be better off just staying where they are." Darien chimed in.

"Toe Head", who wasn't interested in sitting with them either, added. "Thank you for the invitation, but no, I'm sure we'll find a spot." He looked at Serena, immediately dismissing them. "Shall we""

"It was nice to meet you Allison...Darien, it was good to see you again. Maybe we'll see each other around," She smiled briefly; whatever anger she had from his earlier comment now gone, before turning to disappear into the crowd.

Darien watched as she walked away. "She seems nice, but that guy, eh!, not so much," Allison remarked bringing him out of his thoughts.

He laughed as they sat back down waiting for the music to start back up. "Yeah, he was sort of a prick." He ran his hand through his hair, looking around to see where Serena was seated. The waitress returned with their drinks.

"She's very pretty. Did you two ever date?" Allison asked, surprising him.

"Uh, no...Well we went out a few times, but it was never serious." He had no idea why he chose to lie, and as he took a sip from his beer, he hoped she would drop the subject.

"Well, I guess it's a good thing for me that it didn't because I probably wouldn't be here with you now," She leaned over and kissed his cheek, then started clapping as the band struck up.

Yeah, He thought, taking another sip of his beer. ...it's a good thing.

Currently

Their rhythmic breathing was slowing down.

Serena felt Darien kiss the hollow of her neck while stroking her legs that hung loosely around his waist. Carelessly she twirled the fingers of one hand in his raven mane, pulling his body in closer with the other, afraid to let go. But as the sounds of the bar: the music, people laughing, the sound of someone knocking on the door of the cubical next to them set in, she slowly untangled her legs, shamefully looking away from him, thinking that...

From where she and Patrick were sitting she had a clear view of Darien's table, which didn't help to keep her mind or eyes from wondering over. _He looks happy, and lord help me, he looks good! _She thought to herself over and over, but as she sipped her wine, she couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy that he sat with Allison across the room.

She tried to focus her attention on the stage; let the music wash over her, but each time she snuck a glance at him, the corners of her mouth curled into a smile. Between the surprise of seeing him after all this time, and the fact that he'd finished school and making the world safer to live in, stirred something inside of her. From experience, she knew that the wine wasn't making her feel this way.

So, when she got up and headed towards the rest room, a part of her knew he would follow. A part of her desperately wanted him to.

As she stared at her reflection in the mirror, oblivious to the noise and people around her, she closed her eyes, thinking. Of all the places in London. Why, here? Why, now? When she opened them, Darien was standing behind her regarding her intently, she immediately felt naked and vulnerable under his gaze.

"Hi," He said apprehensively.

She didn't move or respond immediately, she simply stared at him, desperately trying to make sense of the warring thoughts in her head. _What's wrong with me? Damn it! I've moved on, He's moved on! I shouldn't still want him like this! _The intensity in his midnight blue eyes made her shudder inwardly, and the realization of her last thought suddenly made her angry. Reaching into her purse, she pulled out her lip-gloss, diverting her eyes as she spoke. "She seems nice."

Darien stuffed his hands in his pockets and rocked back on his heels. "Yeah...she's very cool."

Taking a brief glance at the other occupants in the room, she was grateful of the fact that Londoners, even under the strangest of occurrences, minded their own business.

Darien moved in closer, and she inhaled the faint scent of his cologne. The dress she had chosen to wear provided no barrier, and his nearness was setting off a tingling on her skin. When he lightly brushed her shoulder, she felt her heart flutter. "He's good to me, you know"" Her voice was rushed.

"Yeah, he seems like a real gem," Sarcasm dripped from his reply.

They stared at one another's reflection in the mirror. Serena wanted to be offended but felt her resolve fading fast. He was standing too close. Her body was betraying her and she was having trouble breathing.

"You shouldn't be in here, I shouldn't be in here," Shaking her head, she tossed her lip-gloss back in her purse and turned to leave.

Darien grabbed her hand. "Bella," Serena looked into his impossibly blue eyes and melted. "Don't...don't leave, please?" He begged before pulling her into a searing kiss. From that point on, all rational thought ceased to exist.

Four years had done nothing to erase what came as natural as breathing.


	3. The next day

The next day

"You did what?!" Mina asked for the third time.

Serena looked around nervously at the other patrons. They were at "Les Halles" bistro having lunch. "Will you keep your voice down!" She scolded through gritted teeth.

Mina sat back in her chair, regarding Serena with a stunned expression on her face. She was quiet for a moment before sitting forward to speak. "Serena, okay. Go through this with me one more time," The journalist in her coming out, "how exactly did you and Darien end up in the cubical of a women's loo," She looked around briefly, before leaning further across the table, "shagging?!" The last part came out in a harsh whisper.

Serena looked out at the lunch- time traffic passing by on Park Avenue. She ran her hand through her dark hair before turning to look at Mina once again. "What else do you want me to say, Mina? One minute I'm sitting at the table with Patrick sipping my wine, then before I knew it I'm in the loo with my skirt up around my waist," She put her head in her hands momentarily then looked back up, panic in her eyes. "Mina, what have I done? What's wrong with me? I haven't seen Darien in four fucking years! I see him again one night and within minutes we're going at it like two horny teenagers!"

Mina reached across the table and touched Serena's arm trying to reassure her. "Serena, look it's going to be okay."

Serena looked out the window again. "No, Mina it's not," She shook her head. "Four years I don't see this man, four years! And within minutes I'm screwing him in a cubical like some hooker! What the hell is that all about?"

"Look Serena, I agree that what you and Darien did was wrong but, I don't know," Mina smiled a little and shrugged. "Sort of sexy and exciting when you think about it."

Serena looked at her shocked. "Mina!"

"Okay, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that, but it's pretty obvious that there's still something between you two," She held up a finger falling back into journalist mode. "And I still hold the opinion that you and Darien's break-up was just a huge misunderstanding."

Serena glared at Mina scornfully. "No, a misunderstanding is when you give someone bad directions to your house. Darien stumbling home drunk smelling like cheap perfume and pussy is far more than a misunderstanding!" She took a huge gulp from her lemonade. Her eyes flashing with anger.

Mina took a deep breath and looked out at the traffic going by for a moment before she spoke again. She knew this subject was still extremely touchy for her Serena. Four years hadn't completely healed the wounds that she still bared. "So, did you two talk at all, you know, afterwards""

Biting at her bottom lip, Serena shook her head. "No, not really," She tossed her hair over her shoulder. "After we were done, I told him it was wrong and that we shouldn't have done it. I made him leave the cubical and I just sat there for a while. God, what's wrong with me?" She brushed away another tear.

"Nothing, nothing's wrong with you Serena. You just had a lapse in judgment that's all."

Serena snorted out a laugh. "Yeah, lapse in judgment is an understatement. And you know what I feel the worst about, his girlfriend Allison." Frustrated, she tossed her linen napkin on the table.

"Yeah, she's really cool. Darien's brought her by the house a few times," Mina replied.

"I know, and she even asked me if," Serena stopped suddenly realizing what Mina had just said. "Wait a minute, what do you mean Darien's brought her by you and Andrew's place a few times? You've never mentioned that Darien was in London-" Her eyes narrowed as understanding dawned. "And he did say last night that he'd been in London for three years and you never said a word?! Serena asked, her voice rising.

It was Mina's turn to look around the restaurant nervously. "I uh...we'll see, I just barely knew that Darien was here, and I, oh crap, Serena I'm sorry." She looked at her friends, shocked face. "I wanted to tell you a long time ago, really I did, but every time I even mentioned Darien's name you changed the subject or hung up on me."

"Mina I've been in London three weeks...and you never said a word! Even while I was in Italy! How could you not say anything to me about him being here?!" Serena asked ignoring the stares she was getting from the other patrons. "Did you tell him that I was here?"

"No, no I swear I didn't say anything to him either about you living here now. I just figured the chances of you two running into one another in London were pretty slim, you know?" She was looking at Serena apologetically.

Serena sat back in her chair shaking her head in disbelief. "Slim, huh?" She ran her tongue over her teeth. "And I suppose that one of those slim chances was just going to present itself this weekend at you and Andrew's party?" She sat forward lowering her voice. "Mina! How could you not tell me he was here?! And how could you not tell me that he had a girlfriend?!"

Mina rolled her eyes but decided she wasn't going to feel guilty about not divulging this information to Serena. "Okay, so maybe I should have told you that Darien was living here, and that he has a girlfriend. But you have Patrick right?" She sat back and crossed her arms in thought. "Which, now that I think about it, that fact didn't make much difference since you two still,"

Serena pointed her finger at Mina warningly. "Don't you say it!"

Mina tilted her head, smiling. "Had sex in a woman's restroom!" She finished.

Serena threw a crouton from her salad at her. "Oh, you bitch!"

Mina started to laugh and after a moment Serena did too.

After a few moments, still smiling Serena said. "Mina you really should have told me."

"Yeah, I know, and I'm really sorry. I figured if I mentioned to either of you that you were both living here now, I wouldn't be able to get either of you to come to the party this weekend. I just want you two to finally talk, I mean it's been four years," Mina covered her mouth trying to stifle a laugh. "But who could have guessed that you two would," She trailed off.

"I know, I know, please just don't remind me," Serena pleaded shaking her head reproachfully. They looked at one another for a moment and started laughing again.

"So, you do realize that I can't come to your party now?"

"Serena! You have to come! I can't handle all those tightwads from Andrew's firm alone!" Mina replied in a panic.

Serena shrugged. "Well, I can't see Darien's face again, at least not right now. Besides, Allison will be there, and I really can't face her right now," Serena stated, briefly covering her face in shame.

"I don't suppose you would change your mind if I told you that Allison won't be there? She's going out of town tomorrow."

"No Mina, it wouldn't!" Serena took a deep breath and looked at her friend crossly. "I just think that, the further Darien and I stay away from one another right now, the better off I'll be."

"It was that good, huh?" Mina asked.

"Omygod, you have no idea!" Serena replied, biting at her bottom lip.

"Look, Serena it's going to be fine. I promise. I'll be there, so will Andrew and a room full of other people to run interference. And think about it, you won't have to worry about Patrick being there making things even weirder, since he can't come." Mina said this hoping her satisfaction with the latter part of that statement didn't show on her face.

Serena ran her hand through her hair again. Patrick. He had barely crossed her mind since last night, and this made her feel even guiltier about what she and Darien had done. Serena cared for Patrick greatly, but she wasn't in love with him. And somehow that made things worse.

She took a deep breath. "Fine, I'll be there. But if things get weird, I'm out of there." She grabbed her purse. "And lunch is on you."

Mina smiled and thought to herself" One down.

Across town

"Andrew, you fucker! Why the hell didn't you tell me that Serena was living in London?!" Darien barked out of the. Andrew sat on the other end, waiting for Darien to finish. "You screwed me, man!"

Andrew placed the phone back to his ear. "Wait, how did I, screw you? Do I need to remind you my friend of who was in a women's loo last night giving it to their old girlfriend while the current one sat out in the bar? " Andrew waited a moment for Darien to reply. "Look Darien, I wanted to tell you man, I did, but Mina swore me to secrecy. She threatened to hold out on me, mate! And I'm sorry, I wasn't about to give up any loving for you or Serena either one!"

Despite his mood, Darien started laughing at Andrew's sad confession. "Alright, man, I guess I can understand that. Man, I can't believe this shit!"

Andrew recognized the anguish in his friend's voice, and as a general rule he didn't show much emotion. But he also knew Darien well enough to know that when it came to Serena, the rules had never really applied.

"So did Allison suspect anything?" Andrew asked calmly.

Darien leaned his head against the wall, sighing heavily. Besides Serena, Allison had only entered into his mind a few times since last night. "No, and you know what makes this even crazier? After we left the bar, she kept going on and on about how nice she thought Serena was and how fun it would be if we could all get together some weekend." He paused for a moment. "Oh, and speaking of...if Serena's going to be at your party this weekend...I'm not coming."

"Wait, what?! No, man you have to come!" Andrew's voice was panicked. "I can't take all those hippies from Mina's job by myself. Besides, Mina would freak if you didn't show up, and I'm really looking forward to getting her juiced up at the party and taking advantage of her later!"

"Well, too bad, because I can't take running into Serena or "Toe Head" again right now, especially since Allison won't be there. It's just a really bad idea."

There was a moment of silence. "So it was that good, huh?" Andrew asked unaware that his wife had just asked the same question to Serena across town.

"Hino, when have you ever known me to divulge that type of information to you?" Andrew didn't respond and Darien rolled his eyes because he knew Andrew was sitting on the other end grinning stupidly. "What the hell do you think? Fuck yes, it was that good!"

"Look, mate, I know that seeing Serena again may be a tad awkward, but you two really need to talk. Beside, you promised Mina, so you have to come. Plus, there will be a room," He mused, then added. "Then of course you two were in a bar full of people, last night and you two still-"

"Hino, I swear if you finish that sentence I will come down to you job and kick your ass!"

Andrew held back a laugh. "Okay, okay I'm sorry pal. But seriously, just say that you'll be there. At the very least make an appearance, okay?"

Darien cleared his throat. "Fine, I'll be there for Mina. But, I swear if things get weird, I'm so out of there."

Andrew hung up the phone thinking, Yes, yes. But immediately thought. Seems like there was something else I was supposed to tell him"


	4. Saturday Night

Saturday night...

"You prat! Why didn't you tell me that Serena was coming here alone tonight?" Darien said pushed Andrew into his kitchen.

Andrew wrinkled his nose remembering. Oh, right, that's what I forgot to tell him.

"What the hell, man?!" He pointed his finger at him angrily. "I should really kick your ass for this!"

Andrew slapped Darien playfully on his arm, laughing nervously. "You know, funny thing, true thing. It turns out that Serena's life-sized ken doll went out of town today, and he won't be here tonight."

Darien stared at him; his expression blank before he punched Andrew in the arm. "You should have told me you son-of-a-bitch!"

"Okay, low!" He looked at Darien wounded. "What are you so worried up about anyway? You said that you didn't want to run into Serena and her boy toy, and He's not here, so."

Mina walked into the kitchen at that moment, looking around wildly. "What the bloody hell are you two doing in here?! I'm out there alone with your stiff co-workers, Andrew! Not to mention those dips from my job!"

"Man, forget about them! Did you know that Serena was coming here alone tonight? Because your spindly husband forgot to mention it to me!"

Mina looked at Darien, confusion on her face. "What are you talking about?" She shook her head. "And what difference does it make if she came alone? All I know is that both of you better get your asses out there right now before I drag you out there myself!" She turned and walked out of the kitchen in a huff.

They stood, staring at one another. Andrew was still rubbing his arm, a goofy grin on his face. Darien had a snarl on his.

The kitchen door swung open again, slowly. "Now!" Mina yelled.

Darien had spent the better part of the previous two days trying to figure out what he was going to say when he saw Serena again. Everything he'd come up with went completely out of his head when he saw her walk through the door.

Walking back into the living room, he saw her standing by the fireplace talking to two of Mina's male co-workers. She was wearing a dark red sundress with thin straps. It was one of his favorite colors on her and it fit her body like a glove.

Since the room was better lit then the bar was the other night, he noticed for the first time how tanned her skin was, which complimented the dress perfectly.

Her hair was down and not surprisingly; she was wearing it much like she had throughout high school and college. It was longer now, and it hung in loose beautiful curls half way down her back. He always had a thing for her hair. This is going to be a long night. He thought to himself as he took another sip from his drink.

~'

Serena drew in a long, slow breath as she watched Darien stroll into Mina and Andrew's living room; that usual swagger in his step. She smiled inwardly, amazed at how he wore that casual confidence like a well tailored-suit.

She was trying to concentrate on the boring conversation she had found herself in, but couldn't help herself from stealing appreciative glances at him. Damn, that green looks good on him. She thought as she briefly met his gaze from across the room.

She noticed, like the other night he wasn't wearing his glasses and she could see his beautiful green eyes. Oh, this is no good! He doesn't belong to me anymore. She thought regretfully.

To distract herself, Serena plastered a fake smile on her face and feigned interest in the men who stood around her.

~'

"So how's operation get them to finally talk going there lovely lady"" Andrew asked jokingly as he guided Mina into a quiet corner.

"Not so good. The stubborn bastards have successfully avoided one another for almost an hour now. " Mina took a sip of her drink. "And you and I both know that when those two were together, they could never go more than ten minutes in the same room without at least touching." She looked at him briefly. "Hence the other night at the bar."

Andrew nodded in agreement. "Well, it could be worse, they could be having sex in our toilet right now, so."

"That's true," Mina wrinkled her nose at the thought. "So, what should we do?"

"Nothing." Andrew put his arm around her waist. "Look, I know you want to help, but Darien and Serena are complicated enough without us getting any more involved. They'll figure it out, okay?" He kissed her on her cheek before leading her back into the party. "Now come, let's get you another drink, shall we?"

~'

Darien slipped out on the balcony to get some fresh air, and to clear his head.

He and Serena had managed to avoid one another up until now, but for him it was getting harder to do by the minute. As he was taking a deep breath he heard the balcony doors open; turning he regarded Serena looking at him pensively.

"I thought I saw you come out here," She walked over and stood beside him, keeping her voice light. "It's really nice out here."

"Yeah, late spring in London is nice," He replied coolly. They stood in uncomfortable silence for a while, avoiding eye contact. "So, how was Italy?" Darien finally asked.

"It's wonderful. There are some beautiful places there," She stared straight ahead as she spoke. "The culture is so different than it is in Britain, but I really loved living in Milan."

He nodded and looked over at her briefly. "Wow, that's uh, that's great," They immediately lapsed back into that uncomfortable silence again.

Serena fidgeted with a strap on her dress as several seconds passed before she spoke. "Darien, about the other night-"

He cut her off. "So why are you back? If you loved living in Italy so much, why are you here?" The tone of his voice was biting. "Let me guess "Toe Head", oh, I'm sorry, I meant Patrick must have asked you to come back."

The bitterness in his tone was a surprise even to him. But listening to her go on about how great living in Italy was, evoked his guilt on how bad things had gotten between them and the huge part he'd played in that.

"Well, at least he was worth coming back for!" She replied with equal venom.

He choked out a sarcastic laugh, "Oh, yeah that's right, He's good to you. How could I forget?"

She put her hand up hoping to avoid any harsher comments. "Look Darien, I didn't come out here to argue. I just wanted to-"

"You wanted to what?" He interrupted again. "Tell me how great your life has been since you took off four years ago without so much as a letter, card or a fuckin call!"

Serena crossed her arms, regarding him scornfully. "What was there to say Darien? Hey, just in case it isn't obvious enough, I've left you because you fucked around on me! Would that had somehow eased your conscious?" She pointed her finger at him accusingly. "You wanted out of our relationship long before I left, Darien, I just made the shit easy for you!"

They stood staring at one another angrily, neither willing to back down. Then within seconds they were enthralled in a scorching kiss.

This wasn't her plan. When she followed him out onto the balcony she only meant to talk, try to clear the air between them somehow. But everything went haywire as soon as they started arguing. She felt that all too familiar arousal from just being in his presence. Now as Darien pressed her back against the balcony railing, grinding his body into hers, her plan all but disappeared.

Everything in him screamed bad idea when he placed his hands on her face and pulled her into their kiss. Despite rational thought, he was perilous to stop when he felt her hands move between his legs, exciting an erection...he pushed all thoughts aside.

She felt his hands slid under her dress. Her breath caught in her throat as he used the back of his hand to gently stroke her clit over the material of her panties; flinching involuntarily as a fiery spark drummed through her body.

"I don't know Allison, maybe He's out on the balcony!" Mina said in a louder than normal voice, from the other side of the door.

They had just enough time to straighten out their clothes and retreat to safe distances before Mina and Allison opened the balcony doors.

"Surprise!" Allison exclaimed as she stepped onto the balcony smiling.

Darien blinked away surprise as he walked over and hugged her. "Hey, wha...what are doing here? I wasn't expecting you back until tomorrow evening"" He looked over at Serena's guilt stricken face.

Serena tilted her head and looked a question at Mina. Mina shrugged, mouthing the words. I'm sorry.

"They cancelled the seminar for tomorrow because the speaker got sick. So, I flew back this afternoon, dropped my bags off at home and came right over."

She stopped and looked between Darien and Serena, her brow furrowed slightly. "Hey, Serena. I didn't know you would be here." She smiled apprehensively, still regarding their faces. "What are you two out here talking about?"

Serena ran her hand through her hair trying to mask her flustered emotions. "Hey Allison, we were just...catching up on old times," she gestured with her hands. "I was just asking Darien why you weren't here."

"Oh," She continued to regard them for an uncertainly before she waved a dismissive hand. "Well, I'm glad you're here. We didn't get a chance to really talk the other night."

"You're right; we didn't get a chance to talk much the other night. But you know what? It will have to be another time, I really need to go," She looked at Darien crossly as she walked past him.

"No, please stay. I hoping you could tell me some juicy gossip about the fashion industry."

From behind Allison, Darien looked at Serena apologetically. "Serena, wait I uh-,"

She cut him off. "Normally, I would love to Allison, but unfortunately I have to go into the office pretty early in the morning." Serena squeezed her hands briefly and looked at Mina. "I'll call you later, okay""

"Well, let me give you my card at least, we can do lunch one day," Allison offered reaching into her purse.

Serena looked up at Darien again, her gaze full of anger. She smiled sweetly when Allison handed her, her business card.

"I'll uh, I'll call you, I promise." She took the card hesitantly. "Well, goodnight." She looked at Darien once more, turned and hurriedly left the party.


	5. May 2000

May 2000

Serena felt her body edge closer to its mounting release as Darien moved relentlessly within her. She clung to his back relishing the feel of his muscles stretching and contracting under her hands. Each rhythmic stroke seared with a primitive, urgent need, filling her completely.

It had been weeks since they had last made love, and with each thrust, she enveloped the desperation in their lovemaking as if it were to be their last.

Darien stammered mentally as Serena's folds engulfed him possessively, and he fought to maintain some control. Easing out, almost completely, he slowed his movements to press against her center, before plunging deep inside again. He sensed the desperation in their act as well and he inhaled the scent of Serena's hair, committing it to memory. When he felt her walls restrict and hold around him, he pulled her small frame in tight and reluctantly let go.

Several moments passed as they caught their breath. They laid facing away from one another listening to the wee-morning traffic and the wireless starting to play This Masquerade by George Benson softly in the living room of their tiny flat.

Darien wanted to reach out for the Serena to draw her in so he could feel the warmth of her body for some reassurance that things would get better between them, but he remained still.

Serena desired the comfort of Darien's arms around her, to feel the security his embrace always provided, but she remained still as well.

As the sound of George Benson's voice wafted into their bedroom and he sang the haunting lyrics:

Are we really happy here

With this lonely game we play

Looking for words, to say

Searching but not finding

Understanding, anyway

We're lost " in a masquerade

They felt the heavy despair that had been lying in their hearts for months return.

Serena heard him sigh heavily while he sat up on the edge of the bed. She knew that he was watching her and she turned her head to look over her shoulder. "Are you okay"

"Yeah, I'm fine." He reached for his sweats, grabbed a t-shirt and headed from the living room.

"Darien?"

"Get some sleep Bella. You have a big day ahead of you."

His tone was neither harsh nor comforting, but Serena recognized the resentful undertow in it. He walked out of their bedroom closing the door, negating any conversation they needed to have.

I always gave my best

Your memory serves you so badly

Some people kill for less

Yet I'd still die for you gladly

Oh, so gladly

Darien stood with his hand on the doorknob, head pressed against the door debating whether he should go back in. As badly as they needed to, talking, he knew would only lead to another argument. With a sigh, he decided against it and headed for the kitchen.

For months things had been strained between them. Conflicting work and school schedules as well as differing interests had virtually made them strangers in the same home.

Days would go by with little conversation and eventually the continual silence caused a huge rift that had gotten bigger by the day.

If a sufficient reason had been asked of either, as to the why, nothing other than they had simply grown apart could have been given.

He retrieved a beer out of the refrigerator and shook out a cigarette from his pack that lay on the table. For a moment, he paused to consider the fact that Serena hated when he smoked in their flat. Shrugging, he lit the match anyway and took a long drag.

Turning on the living room lamp, he noticed the various magazines and sketches from Serena's design classes.

In a few hours the Oxford, class of 2000 would be walking across a stage to receive their diplomas of completion of education.

Mr. and Mrs. Tsukino, Ray, Lita, Ami, Mina and Andrew were all driving up to watch the commencement.

For him it would be a bittersweet celebration. Unlike his friends and Serena, he wouldn't be receiving his diploma.

Serena drew her legs up to her chest and turned her head to look out their bedroom window, thinking solemnly: We can't keep on like this. They needed to talk. It had become too convenient to blame work and school schedules as the source of their silence. They didn't have the luxury of pretending there wasn't a problem anymore.

She knew that Darien was embarrassed and nervous about graduation and the possible questions that he may have to face. Her attempts to comfort him concerning this went mostly in vain and coupled with everything else they had been going through the past few months...his resistance had left her feeling quite simply, tired.

Tired from constantly arguing. Tired from not knowing if they had a future together. But mostly, she was tired from the guilt she had been carrying around lately. Despite how much she still loved him, a part of her had stopped caring about how he felt anymore.

Serena got out of bed and walked towards their loo, smelling the scent of cigarette smoke she shook head, sighing heavily. Grabbing her robe off the door she headed into the living room.

But I suppose it's my turn now

To play a scene that's familiar somehow

I turn the page and you walk away

Not even love could bring you to stay

This time

Walk away so easy

Darien was crushing out his cigarette when Serena walked out of their bedroom tying up her robe. Her hair stood wild about her head, the glow from satisfaction still on her face, he thought she looked beautiful.

Serena walked over to the couch to sit beside him. Taking his beer out of his hand, she took a long swig before silently handing it back.

"Everyone will be here in a few hours," He stated avoiding her gaze.

"Yeah I know. I couldn't sleep."

They lapsed into the uncomfortable silence that had invaded their lives for weeks like an unwelcome guest before Serena spoke up. "Darien, we need to talk."

"Damn, Serena! Can we have one night without having to get into some huge discussion"" He rose from the couch, walked over to the kitchen table, pulling out another cigarette.

"Oh, I'm sorry Darien. You're absolutely right. Why ruin the first night we've touched each other in weeks with a conversation about why we haven't touched each other in weeks?!" She threw her hands up. "I mean, what the hell was I thinking?"

Darien lit his cigarette and peered at her through a cloud of smoke.

"You want to talk? Okay let's talk." He took a short drag. "Let me guess. You got another job offer from some company in Paris this time, and even though you knew about it three days ago, you're just now getting around to telling me? Sort of like the job offer you got from Milan, right?"

Serena bit at her bottom lip and nodded before she replied. "Wow. You know what Darien? I'm surprised I even got the opportunity to tell you about my job offer, seeing that, you're...hardly...ever...here!" She bit back angrily.

He rolled his eyes.

"Oh, what? Am I wrong? I mean, you tell me its work, but how do I know you're not sleeping with someone else?" She crossed her arms defensively.

"Serena, shit! Because I've told you a thousand times! I'm not fuckin' sleeping with someone else! Either you believe me about this shit or you don't!" He replied testily.

"Fine, then what Darien?! Your whereabouts are a complete mystery most of the time and hell I know it's not because you've had your ass in class otherwise you…" She stopped suddenly realizing she had said too much.

"No, no Serena go on, please. It's how you really feel, don't be shy," He shrugged his shoulders. "Fuck it. I say we put the shit out there once and for all." He cleared his throat. "I'm not graduating. There, I said it. Now we can both stop pretending that we don't see that big ass elephant taking a dump over in the corner. I'm not fuckin graduating! And I know how embarrassing this must be for you, because it doesn't fit into your perfect little plans, but shit happens!"

Serena got up from the couch, her mix match eyes blazing. "Oh, boo fuckin hoo, Darien! I have never said one negative thing about you not graduating on time, ever! So, don't try and lay that bullshit on me!"

Darien's response to her words was taking another drag off his cigarette.

This is getting us nowhere. Serena thought as she cupped her hands over her mouth, looking away. This was all they had done the past few months and it had gotten progressively worse. She wrapped her arms around her waist trying to come to a resolve in her mind. Is any of this still worth it? Is he still worth it?

Lowering her head for a moment, Serena looked up and stared into the blue eyes of the man she had fallen in love with so many years before, and decided it was. She exhaled a long breath before she spoke.

"Darien, look. I know that you're upset about not graduating. I know that. But baby...it's only two classes. You can have those done by the end of the summer with no problem, we both know that," She placed her hands on his chest. "And I realize that things have been awkward between us for a while and I take my share of the blame in whatever's gone wrong." She reached up and stroked his temple, brushing back a lock of his hair.

Darien's expression didn't change and she continued hesitantly.

"See, I've been thinking that this job offer in Milan can be good for the both of us," Serena placed one hand on his cheek. "Think about it, baby. All the craziness of the past few months we can put behind us. Start new, get back to how we used to be."

Darien continued to gaze at her through the smoke, not responding.

"And, you already know that you can attend Med School there as well as you could here. Not to mention the fact that we would be living in Italy baby, this can be good for us, we shouldn't pass it up," Serena searched his face, her eyes pleading with him.

Once more I'm learning

In the depths of my despair

Your lies confirming

True love is so rare

Darien took a final drag on his cigarette before crushing it out. Staring at her intently, he twisted his mouth to the side and blew out a long trail of smoke. "You've got it all figured out, huh?"

Serena knitted her brow in confusion.

"Move to Milan. Forget about all our problems. Live happily ever after. Is that right?" His mood was growing darker with each word and he disregarded the growing concern on her face.

"You know, the more I think about it Serena. If you really wanted me to move to Italy with you, it wouldn't have taken you three days to tell me about your job offer. I think the only reason why you bothered to tell me was because you felt obligated to." He crossed his arms. "And, I'm not sure if I want to go."

As soon as the words came out of his mouth he regretted them. The pained expression that floated across her face pierced his heart, as did the realization that he had been harboring the idea of going on with his life without her. Although he was still in love with her and the larger part of him wanted things back the way they used to between them as badly as she did, the realist in him understood that maybe they'd given this impossible relationship all they could and now it was best if they let it go while things were still somewhat civil.

"You...I, I thought you said you were still considering it," She stammered over her words, grasping for understanding. "So, you don't...You're not going to Italy with me?"

"I don't know," He replied softly.

Serena recoiled as if struck. She pulled her robe tighter around her body like she was warding off a sudden chill.

"What do mean, you don't know?" Her voice choked with emotion. "Darien, I've accepted that job offer, and if...if you don't come, what happens to us?"

"I don't know," He repeated quietly.

"So you don't want to be with me anymore?"

"You," he shifted uncomfortably. "You have this great opportunity to go off and do what it is you love to do." The words came out in a stammer.

"You didn't answer my question." Her anger returning. "Do you want to be with me or not? Because if you can see your future without me and you being together, what the hell have we been doing all this time?"

"I haven't said no, okay!" He replied guiltily, softening his voice as he continued, "And yes, I still want to be with you. I just, I don't know if moving to Milan is the right thing for the both of us right now."

"You mean you don't know if it's the right thing for you," She slowly backed away from him.

Darien didn't reply, his silence telling all.

Serena scoffed out a bitter laugh. "I can't believe this. For months I've been trying to get you to tell me what You're feeling. Long before my job offer, and you drop this on me now?" She shook her head. "I don't...I don't even know how to reply to that."

"Bella," He reached out for her hand but she pulled away.

"No," She put her hand up and he stopped. "No," Walking to the bedroom door she paused. "I'm going to bed now because our family and friends will be here in a few hours like you said," She looked up at him, hurt, disappointment and confusion in her glare. "We'll talk later, I guess."

Without another word she walked into their bedroom and closed the door.

Darien spent the first of many sleepless nights on the couch.

And I suppose it's my turn now

There's no more love only feelings of doubt

Gone with the hope your words have erased

Gone with the smile you wiped from my face...

Graduation

When he walked into their flat that night, it took his mind several minutes to realize what his eyes noticed immediately.

Flashes of the previous twenty-four hours came fluttering back.

He recognized the girl. Maybe from one of his classes or perhaps he had seen her eating at the Crown Arcade. It didn't matter. He was drunk and angry.

She was cute. She wasn't pretty or beautiful, like Serena, but cute.

"Hey you're Darien Sheilds," He couldn't think of her name. It didn't matter. "So where's your girlfriend?" A question he'd been asked before.

They were kissing in someone's room. The cute girl's lips didn't taste like Serena's. Fuck it, it didn't matter. He stopped for a moment and took a swig from his beer trying to force down the guilt that was threatening to bubble up.

He fell back on the bed, the cute girl attacked his neck. She didn't feel like Serena. But he was drunk, so it didn't matter.

Her shirt was off. She wore no bra. He should have been excited. He felt the cute girl unzip and remove his pants. He took another sip from his beer before she removed it from his hand.

"Relax baby, this is graduation day." He couldn't make out the cute girl's face anymore, and she didn't smell like Serena.

The colors in the room were swarming together. The weed and alcohol were kicking in and he was still angry.

The cute girl wasn't Serena, he couldn't keep his eyes open any longer, and he suddenly realized that it did matter, but darkness was threatening to take him under, and it really did matter, because the cute girl wasn't Serena, then darkness.

Flashes

It was eight o'clock the next morning.

Serena yanked the door open while he was fumbling with the lock. She was furious. "Where the hell have you been?!" He thought she looked beautiful.

His head was pounding. He couldn't recall how he got home or where he had been. But there was this girl.

"Darien, I've been looking for you everywhere! You had us all worried!" Beyond the anger he heard the concern, but he didn't care, he was still angry.

Flashes

"Oh, Darien let me get a picture of your diploma too." Mrs. Tsukina.

The tense look he and Serena exchanged. The quiet that fell over the room when he didn't move, the shameful look Serena gave him before she turned her head away.

Now he remembered why he had taken off the day before. He walked past her without a word. He didn't feel like talking.

She followed him into the kitchen as he grabbed a beer out of the refrigerator. "Darien, do you hear me talking to you, where have you been? I went your job, I went to all your hangouts,"

"I fucking heard you the first time! Fuck, just shut up!" It hurt his head to shout and he ignored the shocked look on her face by trying to walk past her.

"What did you say to me?" She grabbed his arm. "You take off and leave when all our friends and family are here, with no explanation and you stumble in here drunk off your ass with nothing to say?"

He took a swig from his beer. Her voice was boring into his head like a drill.

"Where the fuck have you been?"

His mind kept trying to conjure the girl's face. He remembered she was cute, not pretty like Serena, but cute.

He didn't reply, he was due at work an hour ago.

"You slept with someone last night." It was more of a statement than a question.

He was still drunk, and he remembered that it did matter, the cute girl wasn't Serena.

"Whatever." He hadn't slept with the cute girl, but he was still angry and embarrassed so he didn't care what she thought right then. "I'm late for work."

He walked past her into their bedroom. Leaving her speechless.

He felt her fists hit his back. There was screaming and crying. A barrage of "How could you's ?" "Why's?" "I hate you's!" and "Get out's!"

He left, letting her believe whatever she wanted. He should have told her the truth.

Now as he walked slowly around their tiny flat, he took in what was missing.

The books, the various sketches, gone. He felt the first pangs of panic and a sinking feeling in his stomach.

He walked into the bedroom they had shared for the past four years, and looked around. The lace scarves that lay over the lamp by their bed were gone.

In their loo, her robe was gone as well as all her beauty products. Darien felt his heart pounding against his chest.

He started yanking open drawers, her shirts, panties, socks, gone. The pictures of them that sat on the dresser, missing. Her jewelry and the few stuffed animals she still possessed, gone. Panic was overtaking him.

He practically ran over to their closet; hesitating for a moment because he already knew what awaited. He finally opened the door to find all her clothes, shoes, suitcases were all...gone.

Darien stood there shocked. He felt himself going numb. Serena was gone.

There was no note, letter or anything saying goodbye. She was just gone.

The only trace of her left was the faint smell of her perfume, and the picture in his head of her crying

Falling against the wall, Darien sunk to the floor like a heavy weight had been placed upon his shoulders and for the first time since his parents died, he began to cry.


	6. The next morning

'The next morning'

Ring

'_You slept with someone else'_

Ring

'_Whatever'_

'_How could you do this to me again', _Serena was struggling to wake up.

Ring

'_I hate you! I fuckin hate you!'_ She tossed her head about trying to drown out the screams and the piercing sound in her ears.

Ring

'_Get out!'_

Ring

Serena sat up in a panic looking around wildly, and glanced over at the clock on the night table...it was eight o'clock in the morning.

Ring

She grabbed her cell phone and flipped it on. "What?"

"Serena?" It was Mina. "Are you okay? I've been calling you for ten minutes."

Serena lay back pulling the covers over her head. "Yeah, I'm fine. I just uh, I was having a bad dream." She peeked out from under the covers and looked at the clock again. "What are you doing up so early?"

"Andrew," Mina huffed. "He woke me up trying to get some ass."

Serena chuckled despite her irritable mood. "Okay, so what are you doing calling me then?"

"Oh, I sent him to Pepe's bakery to get me some croissants." She responded flippantly.

"You sent him half way across town for croissants"" Serena started laughing. "Damn, you're good."

"Yeah, I am," Mina laughed herself. "Anyway, it serves him right, since he tried to get me drunk last night. Plus, I wanted to talk to you." Her voice turned apologetic. "Serena, I am so sorry about last night. I had no idea Allison was going to show up, I swear."

Serena placed her hand over her eyes. "Don't worry about it, you had no way of knowing."

"Yeah, but I really wanted you and Darien to get a chance to talk. Did you two get a chance to talk?"

"Well, if you consider us getting into it about why I left without a word to Milan four years ago as talking, then yes, we talked," She responded smartly, purposely leaving out their brief entanglement.

"Umph, I'm sorry."

"Yeah, me too." Serena cleared her throat. "So, do you think Allison was suspicious of anything?"

"Well, I know she asked Darien a few questions," She paused, "and she asked me how we knew one another."

Serena put a hand over her eyes again. "What did you say?"

"Luckily, Darien told me before she asked that he introduced when you two were at school. So that's what I told her," Mina shrugged, "she seemed satisfied with that, so."

They were both silent for a moment.

"So, how did the rest of the party go?" Serena asked changing the subject.

"Ugh, a disaster, first, one of Andrew's suit co-workers spilled a drink on Rachel Capshaw, which wasn't so bad in itself because I've never liked her, but the idiot tried to..."

Mina's voice began to wash over Serena almost immediately. She closed her eyes as thoughts of Darien returned replacing remnants of her dream with images of their encounter on the balcony the night before and the interaction at the bar.

She could still feel Darien's mouth on her lips and neck. His hands stroking her thighs. The irrepressible feel of his body against hers. The smell of his skin.

"Then if that wasn't enough, I walk into the kitchen and caught my boss," Mina continued.

Serena was trying to force herself to listen, but her thoughts kept shifting back to Darien.

The naked look in his eyes. His face between her legs, eliciting a shameless reaction from her body. The stubble from his beard exciting her skin. And the delicious feeling of him moving inside of her. Taking what was his, giving what was hers.

"Then he tries to tell me it was just a misunderstanding…"

Misunderstanding. The word snapped Serena out of her current thought back to another.

And I still hold the opinion that you and Darien's break-up was a huge misunderstanding.

"What did you just say?" Serena sat up suddenly, interrupting Mina's rant.

"I said that Mr. Kinnard and his secretary Sheila getting busted tongue battling in my kitchen..."

"No, what did you mean by an misunderstanding?"

"Huh?"

"You said the other day while we were at lunch that Darien and my break-up was all a misunderstanding, what did you mean by that?"

It took a moment for Mina to realize that Serena had switched subjects. "Oh...oohh." She didn't respond.

"Mina?"

"Um," She bit her lip, debating. "Look, Serena maybe you should talk to Darien about this."

"Okay, don't do that."

"Don't do what?"

"Don't give me that: I think you should talk to Darien, crap. If you didn't want to tell me you wouldn't have brought it up the other day." Serena stated perceptively.

"Okay, for the record, up until the other day when you told me about your little encounter at the bar, you would avoid conversations about Darien like the plague. So don't even try it."

"Okay, whatever," Serena rolled her eyes. "Look, Mina, I realize that I don't exactly have the luxury of avoiding talking about Darien anymore, given what happened the other night. So, please I really want to know."

Mina pondered a moment. "Alright. But, you have to promise you won't get mad at me, okay."

"Fiiiine! I promise, just tell me."

Sighing heavily, Mina began. "Well, up until about six months ago, I was under the same impression you were concerning your break-up with Darien," She hesitated again, feeling like she was betraying a trust.

"Okay," Serena replied slowly.

"I hadn't seen Darien in a few weeks so I stopped by the hospital one night, just to see how it was going. We went to dinner at the Lita's restaurant and were sitting at the bar talking and I could tell something was bothering him. Then out of the blue he looks to me and says, "I miss her, Mina."

When Serena didn't respond she continued.

"He told me about how strained things had gotten between you guys before you left. And, he told me about what really happened the day we graduated and he didn't come home."

Serena pushed the covers back and sat on the edge of her bed. "Wait, wait, wait. What do you mean what really happened the day we graduated? What are you talking about?"

"You said you wouldn't get mad," Mina reminded.

"I'm not mad. Look, I know what happened that night, Mina. Darien got drunk, went out and slept with some tramp." Serena's tone was indignant but there was a trace of doubt in her reply.

"No, Serena he didn't," Mina rolled her eyes sighing heavily again. "Darien didn't cheat on you that night or any other night for that matter. But for reasons I don't even pretend to understand, he let you believe he did."

Serena remained silent. Her mind frantically trying to wrap itself around what Mina had just said.

"Hello"" Mina asked after a long moment.

"Yeah."

"Are you okay?"

"Mina where is Darien today?" Serena jumped out of bed, opened the drawer of her night table and pulled out a piece of paper and pen.

"Uh, at the hospital," She stammered, taken back by the forthright tone of Serena's voice.

"What floor is he on today?"

"It's…"

"Never mind, I'll look it up myself. I'll call you later, okay?" She started to close her fireplace.

"Serena wait! What are you going to do?"

"I don't know yet."

"Oh crap!" She started panicking. "I knew I shouldn't have told you. Serena, you said you wouldn't get mad."

"I'm not mad! Mina look, I'm not going to do anything crazy, okay? But I need to go, I'll call you later, I promise," Serena closed the screen up before she could protest.

Running into the living room, she grabbed a directory to look up the number to the hospital. She was having trouble holding a single thought in her head but one question was constant: Why did he let her believe he had cheated on her again? A part of her already knew the answer, but she needed to hear it from him.

After a long shower, careful attention to hair and makeup, and a deliberate selection out of her closet, Serena called for a cab and made her way to Midtown London.


	7. the end

Darien's morning had started off pretty much like his evening had ended, in frustration.

Sunday mornings were always busy but manageable. Unfortunately, this particular Sunday Darien was short two of his best surgeons. John, the co-operator of the department, hadn't shown up and couldn't be reached. And he was currently playing referee between feuding nurses who were both sleeping with Kevin.

"You want me to tell Lana to stop sleeping with Kevin, so you can continue to sleep with him" Darien looked at the young woman, unbelievably. "Lena, you do know that Kevin is in the middle of a divorced, right?"

"Yeah, but not with Lana, the slut," She responded sulkily.

They were in Darien's office and he was trying for the third time that morning, without success to reach John. He sent out another owl. "Look, I'm your boss" not a mediator. So you and Lana will have to figure this shit out on your own," He walked around his desk and escorted her back into headquarters. "But my advice to you, find someone else to sleep with. Preferably, someone who doesn't work here."

"Oh, c'mon Darien," Lena started to pout.

"And stop stealing Lana's paper work!" He called after her.

Lena stormed out of the office nearly knocking Marly, Darien's assistant, into the wall with the door.

"Whoa," He jerked his thumb over his shoulder towards Lena looking at Darien. "Dat one is always so angry mon, I guess Kevin no stir her drink quite like he do Lana, no?" He asked in his singsong Jamaican accent.

Darien shook his head laughing. "How's it going out there? I'm sorry, we're shorthanded today."

"Ev'ry tings beautiful mon. Tis notin Marly can't handle." He started to restock his papers. "Besides, notin, could spoil me morning now mon, me believes me next ex-wife just came tru da door."

Darien shook his head smiling. "You're next ex-wife, huh? Who's the lucky lady this week?"

Before Marley could reply, John casually strolled into the office. "Darien man you have to tell me your secret with the ladies." He was smiling broadly.

"What the hell are you talking about, and where the hell have you been, man?"

"Aww, long night, I'll fill you in later. But listen, there's this smokin' hot little blonde out in the entrance hall commanding a lot of attention, and she's asking for you," He had an envious smirk on his face.

"It's da same woman me speaks of mon, gorgeous creature she is mon"." Marley and John nodded in agreement.

"What?" Darien walked over and peeked out the glass on the door. Even with her back turned, Darien knew it was Serena.

"Shit," He let the door swing close.

"You know her? What is she like a stalker? Because if she is," John looked out the door again. "Hell, she can stalk me anytime she wants."

"No, she's not a stalker," Darien mumbled more to himself. He was pacing around trying to decide what to do. Although he had been able to think of little else, he wasn't in the mood to deal with Serena at the moment.

Marley and John exchanged a questionable glance then looked back to Darien. "Man, I don't think I've ever seen you flustered before. Especially about a woman."

"Ya, tats not a good look on you, mon," Marley added.

"Look, I'm not flustered, okay?"

"Hey man, I'll be glad to go out there and talk to her for you," John pushed the door open again to look at Serena. "As a matter of fact?"

Darien groaned as he handed John some papers. "Trust me, she's more than either of you could handle." He pointed to the papers, before walking out of the office. "Finish that up for me. I'll be right back."

The children's research and car center was located on the sixth floor of the hospital, giving it's employs and patients a breath taking view of the city.

Mina mentioned to her that Darien was allowed to redecorate headquarters when he took over for the department head. The room held a tranquil, warm atmosphere like a vacation to Tahiti or the Caribbean's. Complete with a large aquarium that accented the room perfectly.

She was taking all this in when a man walked past her, turned and suddenly addressed her.

"A devil in a blue dress. And all this time I thought it was just a myth," It was John. "Please tell me there's something I can do for you, beautiful? An act of worship perhaps?"

Serena gave him an apprehensive look.

"Allow me to introduce myself. I'm John Harper, the co-operator of this place." He grasped her hand smiling. "So I repeat, is there anything I can help you with?"

"I'm looking for Darien Shields, is he in today?" She responded hesitantly, slowly removing her hand from his.

"Oh yeah, He's here. But are you sure you want him, I mean, I'm the talented one?"

Serena laughed as she nodded. "Yeah, I'm pretty sure." She pointed towards the window. "I'll be over here, thanks."

John put his hand over his heart feigning hurt, walking backward towards the kitchen.

Darien made his way through the hall. He was trying to decide what he wanted to say when he reached the window, but he was drawing a blank.

Serena's back was still turned when he walked up and stood next to her.

"Hey."

She looked at him from over the rim of the cup she was drinking out of and smiled. "Hey, yourself."

Okay. wasn't expecting that. He thought, figuring she would still be angry. He decided to go with the mood.

"Somebody said there was a woman causing a disturbance at the window," He smiled observing the dress she was wearing. "Just so you know, my assistant has already made you his next ex-wife. I think it's the dress."

Serena choked out a laugh. "Next ex-wife, huh? Well, I'm flattered, I think."

They smiled at one another before nervously looking away.

"Darien, this place," She looked around the office, shaking her head. "Is beyond words. It's, it's really beautiful."

"Thanks," He leaned forward and looked back at her, unsure of what else to say. "I wanted everyone to feel comfortable, so what you see is to make them feel relaxed and not worry so much."

Serena met his gaze and blushed.

"Would you like a tour?"

"No, no I'm good. But, I was wondering if we could talk. If you're too busy, I can come back."

"Uh, you know what?" Darien considered the busy office for a moment then shrugged. "Yeah, yeah that's cool. But let's get out of here. John can handle things for awhile."

"You mean, Mr. Bad pick-up line?" Serena asked laughing.

"Yeah, that would be him. I need to tell him I'll be back later, okay?"

"Sure."

He returned to the window five minutes later after a barrage of questions from John and Marly about Serena. "Ready?"

Darien watched along with half the men in the hospital as Serena turned removed her purse from the back of a chair.

The dark aqua-colored halter dress she was wearing exposed most of her back and cut dangerously low between her breasts. She looked like a mermaid that swum right out of the mural on the wall. Darien closed his eyes briefly and exhaled a deep breath before following her.

"Where are we going?" She asked looking into her purse, walking towards the entryway.

"Union Square Park is a few blocks over."

"Okay."

When they got out on the street, Darien pulled out his glasses which turned dark when they hit the light. The sun was shining but heavy clouds were threatening to break for a random spring shower.

Serena choked out a laugh. "Oh my god, I can't believe you still wear those!"

"Have to, they've been kind of a good luck charm," He shot her a quick smile.

They walked in silence, both in thought. Out of old habit, when they got to the first intersection, Darien reached out to grasp Serena's hand.

"I'm sorry," He said, withdrawing his hand.

"It's okay," Serena smiled at him timidly then continued to walk. They kept exchanging brief glances for a while before Serena spoke. "John's an interesting one."

Darien chuckled. "That he is."

"How did you two meet?"

"In med school. He's the one who convinced me to move here when we finished."

"Well, He's quite the charmer, he told me I was a devil in a blue dress."

"He wasn't wrong," He glanced over at her, a crooked grin on his face.

Serena hit him playfully on the arm, feigning hurt. "Darien!"

"What? Oh, come on, you in that dress..." He looked her up and down appreciatively. "It's got the devils handy work all over it."

Serena tried not to laugh but gave up after a moment. Once they reached the next intersection they both reached out and grasped hands.

Walking into the park Darien asked. "So, how do you like it so far?"

"Like what?"

"Being back in London."

"What's not to like? I mean its London," She shrugged, eyes dancing. "The shows, the sites, the shopping." She added again, grinning.

"I can only imagine. No shop in London is safe, huh?"

"Not, a, one." She stated proudly.

They walked awhile continuing their easy conversation, skipping around the real subject but knowing it couldn't be avoided.

"So, what did you want to talk to me about?" Darien finally asked.

Serena swung their hands back and forth looking straight ahead. She let out a long breath before she spoke. "You know, on the cab ride down here, I couldn't make up my mind who I was angrier at, you or myself," Her voice was reflective, as she looked up to meet his gaze.

Darien stopped walking and let go of Serena's hand readying his self for an argument.

"The thing is, I still don't know, and I'm not sure if it even matters now."

"What are you talking about?" He questioned, already sensing the answer.

"I talked to Mina this morning. She told me about the talk you and her had about our break-up a few months ago."

Darien ran his hand through his hair looking away.

"Darien, look," She touched his waist briefly. "I just want to know why? Why did you let me believe you had slept with someone else that night?"

He could tell by the tone of her voice she wasn't looking for an argument, but he wasn't prepared to answer her questions either.

Neither took notice of the distant sound of thunder.

"If I had told you, would it have kept you from leaving that day?" He finally asked.

"What? Yes, you know it would have."

"Why?"

Serena shook her head, trying to comprehend. "What do you mean, why? Because I wanted to be with you, and I thought you still wanted to be with me."

"Even though we were both miserable and had been for months? Or am I the only one who remembers that?" His tone was intentionally rude.

She recoiled, glaring at him, nose flaring slightly.

"And you can't stand here and tell me that you didn't feel some sort of relief that morning when I left our flat." He added.

"What I felt was sick to my stomach that morning. What I felt was that my world had just fallen apart," She looked at him incredulously.

The wind was picking up.

He shrugged. "I don't know what you want me to say, Serena."

"I want you to tell me, why? Why would you want me to believe a lie?"

"What difference does it makes now?"

"Of the top of my head? Hmm..let me see. Oh how about the fact that we just had sex in a public loo four days ago and nearly did it again on our friend's balcony last night. Or are those not good enough reasons?" She replied sardonically.

His jaw clinched and he crossed his arms, angered because she was right. He took his glasses off and stared at her for a moment before replying.

"Look at you," He gestured his hand out towards her. "All glamour and prestige. You went off and became a success. You're living the fairy tale life you always wanted. You didn't need me around to do that."

Serena choked out a bitter laugh. "Oh, my god! Are you serious? Do you really believe I stayed with you for six years because I was waiting for you to give me some fuckin' fairy tale life?"

"Didn't you? Weren't you always pushing me to do this and do that? Live up to my potential?"

"Darien, if you had truly believed that then, you wouldn't have stayed with me so long." She regarded him unbelievingly.

Darien shifted uncomfortably but didn't respond.

"I don't believe this," Serena tossed her hands up exasperated and walked a few paces away. Turning back she pointed a finger at him. "I have spent the past four years of my life trying to convince myself that I did the right thing by walking out that day. And you mean to tell me, it was all because you thought you couldn't give me something I never expected from you in the first place?"

The first droplets of rain started to come down.

"What? Do you think you're the only one the past four years have been difficult?!" Darien shot back angrily. "You're not the only one who lost something that day!"

Serena crossed her arms defensively.

"Serena, when you left I was devastated. I came home that evening and everything about you was gone! Every shirt, every shoe, every dress, every stupid stuffed bunny, gone!"

The sky cracked open and the rain came down in heavy sheets. Neither moved.

"Then why did you lie?!" Serena screamed, trying to be heard over the rain and traffic.

"Because I couldn't take seeing that look of disappointment in your eyes anymore! Because pushing you away was easier than having you leave me because you realized you deserved someone better!"

"You lied to me out of some twisted sense of honor?!"

Darien turned his head away not answering.

"That, is such, bullshit!" Serena shot back. "My God, Darien, tell me you were just, tired of trying. Tell me there really was someone else. Hell, tell me you just weren't in love with me anymore!"

"I can't tell you that!" He yelled, interrupting her.

"Why?!"

"Because I don't know how to not be in love with you!"

The words came out in a rush, startling them both. They glared at one another, taking up a familiar stance. The sudden crack of thunder seemed to confirm the truth of Darien's words.

From their first argument years ago at the arcade until this moment, they always understood and accepted their inability to pretend to be anything more than who they really were with each other. That truth bonded them. And as the rain continued to fall, washing away the anger and hurt they realized that four years apart hadn't changed that.

"My bunnies are not stupid," Serena finally said. Her eyes softened as a reluctant smile edged at the corners of her mouth.

"Yes, they are," Darien reached out for her hand, smiling himself. "Come on, before we catch pneumonia."

Serena reached down, removed her sandals then handed them to Darien. Grasping his other hand they ran to get out of the rain.

Five minutes later, thoroughly drenched they entered Darien's flat building. It was an old warehouse that had been converted into lofts.

He opened the gate to the service elevator and let Serena in first. She retreated to the back of the cart pushing her wet hair out of her face breathing heavily.

When he turned to look at her he was immediately aware of how her dress clung to her small frame out lining her hips and breasts. As her chest heaved her erect nipples strained against the wet fabric.

Darien dropped her shoes and covered the distance between them in two strides. He captured her mouth, leaving her breathless. Her hands pulled his body into hers frantically as he pressed her up against the wall, kissing her hungrily.

Her skin was hot, contrasting with the wet clothes. His mouth found her neck then moved down as he pushed the material aside to thumb the swell of one breast as his tongue flickered and sucked on the other.

Serena moaned softly, tangling her fingers in his hair. Arching her back, she opened her body to him then grabbed his hand and trailed it up the inside of her thigh to rest between her legs. Two of his fingers instinctively traced the band of her panties then slid into her slick womanhood.

She let out a small cry as he began to stroke her slowly, sensually.

The elevator stopped as they reached his floor jerking them out of their trance. "I guess, John was right, you are a devil," He smiled against her neck, breathing heavily.

"I guess he was," She whispered huskily into his ear.

Darien looked down at Serena's exposed breasts. A smile played at the corners of her mouth as she watched him slowly pull the top of her dress back over them.

"That may be the first time you've ever put my clothes back on."

"It won't happen again," He bent down picked up her shoes then opened the elevator gate.

Taking her hand, they practically ran down the hallway. He barely got the door to his place open before Serena attacked him.

She pushed him against the door and quickly found his mouth again. The intrusion of her tongue was erotic and sensual and he pulled her in deepening the kiss. He felt dizzy as she pressed her body into his and ran her hand over the swell of his pants.

He reluctantly pulled away from her. "Wait, wait."

"What?" She brought his mouth back to hers.

"We need, to get out, of these clothes," He managed to say between kisses.

"What do you think I'm doing?" She replied, unbuttoning his pants.

"Come on."

Darien led Serena into his bedroom then into his bathroom. He grabbed a large towel and held it open for her.

"Let me you dry off," The dark lust was back in his eyes.

She turned her back, looking over her shoulder and untied the top of her dress letting it drop.

He placed the towel around her shoulders and began to kiss her neck softly. Serena's eyes fluttered close and she leaned into him as he pushed her dress down over her hips. She kicked it aside as it hit the floor.

As his fingers started to slip below the band of her panties she turned and faced him.

"Uh, uh... it's my turn," A seductive smile played on her lips.

She finished unzipping his pants and pushed them down over his hips. He tried to kiss her again but she drew her head back. "No kissing," He raised his hand to stroke her breast but she blocked him. "And no touching."

"Damn, what am I supposed to do?" He asked, frowning.

Pulling his shirt over his head and looking down at his feet she said. "You can take those shoes and socks off. But unless I tell you otherwise, nothing."

She led him back into his bedroom and pushed him on the bed.

"So, along with that dress, was this in your plan all along?"

Serena crawled between his legs and ran her hand up his thigh, smiling. "If you keep talking, you'll never find out."

He obliged, lying back quietly, closing his eyes.

Serena sat back on her knees and regarded him for a long minute. Biting at her nails she looked over his body appreciatively. "Open your eyes. I want to see you." She commanded. He opened them slowly and she felt her excitement grow at the intensity in them.

Trailing her fingers up the inside of his thighs, she felt him quiver at her touch. Memories of the command she had over his body was powerful and intoxicating.

She eased her body over his and began to kiss his neck. Stretching their arms out she interlaced her fingers with his and trailed her tongue over his lips never breaking eye contact.

Serena placed moist hot kisses across his chest and down his belly, taking her time. She raked her nails along his sides and smiled mischievously as his body flinched responsively at her touch. Her hands roamed free teasing his erection.

His eyes started to flutter shut. "I said open them. If you don't, I'll stop."

With a struggle he opened them.

"Good," She took a deep breath. "Now, this is for cutting me off for four years." With a wicked smile she slowly ran her hand up his shaft squeezing lightly at the engorged tip. She lowered her head and flicked her tongue across the head tasting him and feeling his heat.

Darien groaned with pleasure as her hands and mouth continued their assault on him. His body went rigid as he strained his hips against the bed to keep from moving.

Serena felt her own arousal grow each time his body clenched. She had missed the taste of him. She missed the pleasure she derived from watching the expression on his face. But mostly she missed his body against hers and the way he filled her.

When he reached out to touch her hair she pushed his hand away and took him fully in her mouth fondling his stiffened sacs. His breathing seemed to stop all together. Brazen and shameless she continued to torment him until he pulled back and grabbed her waist suddenly flipping her onto her stomach.

She gave a startled gasp but didn't protest. Looking back over her shoulder at him she said. "Otherwise."

He met her dark, hungry gaze and slid over her back to kiss her deeply. Sitting back on his knees he pulled her up with him delving his fingers below the band of her panties seeking out her wet clit again.

She leaned back against him opening her legs further inviting his continual strokes. Her breath caught in her throat as she pressed her hand over his encouraging his fingers to explore deeper.

It was his turn to torment. "Open your eyes."

With a struggle, her eyes fluttered open and she laid her head on his shoulder. Capturing her swollen lips again, his fingers continued their assault between her legs. She could feel his erection pressed against her.

"Darien," Her voice cracked as she pushed against his hand feeling that erotic heat spread through her body.

Darien yanked at the thin bands of her panties, tearing them away, They landed across the room as he guided her onto the bed, entering her from behind with one, smooth powerful thrust. Serena instinctively lifted her hips letting him penetrate deeper.

He lie within her for a moment, feeling her stretch and adjust around him. Using his legs he spread her thighs further apart. His ministrations were gentle at first, but with each stroke the rhythm became savage, primal and intense, neither able to get enough.

Serena met his rhythm by arching her hips against him. Her body felt vibrant and alive like a flame burning inside. Reaching back, she brought his lips to hers.

Darien plunged deeper and deeper with each thrust, filling her with a bright, hot pleasure. They strained together, demanding surrender but neither gave in. His breath quickened as his hips bucked forcefully and he interlocked hands with hers.

Serena felt near tears as she continued to meet his intensity. Each thrust bringing her closer to the brink and she began to shiver beneath him.

An inferno broke and they both cried out. Tears streamed down Serena's cheeks as a white-hot climax drummed through her body. His climax followed a second later; a harsh raw sound escaped his lips as he collapsed into her.

~*~

Later that night they laid in each other's arm listening to the rain fall. Each had a smile of satisfaction on their faces from the hours they spent making love.

The silence was only broken when Serena asked, "Does this mean we're back together?" She knew the answer already but she wanted to hear him say it.

"Yeah, we're back together," He answered with a slight laugh kissing her forehead.

"So all that stands is our way is the people that we're with?" Serena asked feeling the weight of what she had been doing with Darien hit her full force.

"Actually, Allison and I broke up this morning," Darien told her getting out of bed and slipping on a pair of silk boxers.

Serena stayed in his bed but sat up pulling the covers over her chest. "Why?'

Darien looked at her with amusement, "You know why Bella?"

"I didn't want her to get hurt she seemed really nice," Serena said looking into his eyes.

"Neither did I but she knew something was going on between us," Darien sat beside her on the bed. "She said she didn't want to stand in the way of my happiness."

Serena look down in shame and sadness. "That was nice of her." She knew she was on the verge of tears.

Darien grabbed her chin and made her look at him. He saw the unshed tears in her eyes. "Don't be too sad love. She told me she's been cheating on me for months. She wasn't going to tell me but she got pregnant."

Fear flashed in Serena's eyes for a minute. "It's not yours is it?"

"We wouldn't be having this conversation if it was," Darien replied. "So all that stands in our way is 'Toe Head'."

"Actually I walked in on 'Toe Head' fucking his secretary a week ago in his office," Serena informed him feeling embarrassed. "He's out of town for business and I've been looking for an apartment to move into before he gets back tomorrow."

Darien smiled at this, "Well you know this apartment is big enough for two people and at least we don't have to christen the bed, the shower, the couch, the kitchen counter, and the dining room table like we did with our first place. We took care of that today."

A coy smile passed over Serena's face. "Well that makes it the best apartment I've seen yet," She circled her arms around his neck and kissed him.

"You know we still have several walls and the floor that needs to be christened," Darien said pulling Serena from the bed and backing her against the wall.

"Well we better get started then," Serena answered as Darien pushed his boxers down and plunged into her.

THE END


End file.
